Sometimes You Have To Learn To Be Selfish

Selfishness is loaded with negative connotations. Being selfish is not a good thing; it makes other people look down on you with contempt. But sometimes you have to learn to be selfish.

If you are selfish, it means that you do not know how to give to those around you, that you think only of yourself, that you always put yourself first.

We all know that it is not good to be selfish. But here we are talking about an exaggerated attitude, and extremism is not good. There has to be a balance between generosity and selfishness, because you are important too and you have to take care of yourself.

I am in the first place: why it is necessary to learn to be selfish sometimes

Maybe you’ve ever been in a certain situation that made you say something like, “Okay, from now on I’ll be selfish and think only of myself.” This happens when we spend too much time thinking only of others, living our lives for other people and neglecting ourselves.

If you feel bad when you refuse someone or when you can’t be with someone who needs you, it’s probably a matter of guilt, although in reality you shouldn’t feel guilty at all.

You have to give up this behavior and learn to be selfish when you have to.

Have you noticed that other people don’t feel guilty, but you do? Or did you realize that a certain person is taking advantage of your kindness? When you are generous and always put others first, you run the risk of them manipulating you or attaching to you so that you are always close when they need you.

You have to learn to think first of yourself, because you are important too. You don’t always have to sacrifice for others. Selfishness is not always a bad thing, and in this case it is even justified. Does giving yourself all the time and energy for the good of others make you happy or hurt you?

I accept and respect myself

If you don’t accept and respect yourself, why do you think other people would? There are other things that should interest you more than the idea of ​​putting others first.

Although the generosity you show makes you feel good, at some point your life will be taken over by the obsessive interest in the well-being of others.

You no longer know who you really are and you try to please everyone, because you can’t stand the idea of ​​a certain person having a negative opinion about you.

You may end up having a codependent relationship where happiness is not true, but artificial. Respect yourself and accept yourself, because happiness comes from within. 

The problems we face make us stronger and enrich us with valuable experiences. Think about the people in your life: do they do for you what you do for them? Maybe you give too much to those around you and it’s time to learn to be selfish.

It is important to remember to think about yourself. 

If you give, you deserve to receive

In our minds we have this thought that tells us that we must give and give, without receiving anything. It is true that when we help someone or do a good deed, we should not expect anything in return.

But receiving is a different concept. You can give everything to those around you repeatedly, but sooner or later, you have to think about yourself.

We must remember from time to time to put ourselves first, to be selfish, and to think first of our own good.

For many people, this thinking is unacceptable, but remember that when you are overly generous, you can fall victim to manipulation, as I mentioned above. If a person knows that you help him whenever he needs, he can abuse your generosity and altruism.

If you are in a situation where you have to act in a selfish way, that does not mean that you are truly selfish. You simply allow yourself to put yourself first, because you have already given enough to others.

Cultivate your self-esteem

And you are important. You have to learn to be selfish when necessary, to respect and accept yourself as you are. No one will take care of you unless you do it yourself.

If someone has the audacity to accuse you of being selfish, you can answer them as follows: “Yes, I am selfish, because I respect and value myself, and today I will put myself first, because I deserve me too ”.